Becoming A Woman Of Wisdom

“Then David said to Abigail, ‘Blessed be the Lord God of Israel, who sent you to meet me today! May your discernment be blessed, and may you be blessed. Today, you kept me from participating in bloodshed and avenging myself by my own hand.” – 1 Samuel 25: 32-33

Let’s be honest, there are times when we get so angry that we want to take action right away. As you may have learned by now, the first actions we think about in moments of anger and humiliation are rarely the best. As a matter of fact, they often lead to further turmoil. Maybe you can relate to a time when the best action would probably have been a lack of action on your part but you chose to take matters into your hands rather than give them over to God. I know I certainly can relate. Whether replying a few words that cut straight to the heart or doing something I later regretted, I’ve had a few moments just like David when I felt hurt and humiliated and just had to say “So help me God, I will…”. You get the jest of it.

In First Samuel 25, David has led a group of four hundred men to Paran where they end up protecting wealthy Nabal’s shepherds and the land around them. When it came time for the harvest, David sent word to Nabal that he and his men had been a wall around Nabal’s shepherds and never lifted a hand against them. In complete humility, David simply asked that Nabal would return the favor and grant his men anything he could spare so they may eat. Foolish and selfish as Nabal was, he pretended not to know David and threw the young men that delivered the message to him out of his sight. When the men got back to David, they recounted all that Nabal told them. You can only imagine how furious and angry David got. Who could blame him? Frustrated, angry, blood boiling and humiliated, David ordered his men to “put on your sword” (verse 12). Off course, you can imagine where they were headed next and what they were about to do.

However, a servant who had witnessed all that happened between Nabal and David’s young men hurried to tell Abigail the entire matter. And what she did next, you can find tucked between verses 18 and 32.

Abigail, who was Nabal’s wife at the time, was not just any woman. This lady was a woman of wisdom and spiritual discernment. She knew just how to approach the situation to tame the levels of testosterone that were rising rapidly around her. She did not need to think long and hard about what to do in light of the information the servant presented to her. Oh no! Abigail was quick to act and run towards David with a special gift of provision and another gift of godly wisdom. You see, Abigail’s ability to discern what to do in the situation shows how well she was connected to God. Since she trusted in God, inspired by the Spirit, she knew exactly what to do and how urgent it was to carry out the right action quickly. Most importantly, she knew that true wisdom is found in God.

“For the Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and understanding” (Proverbs 2:6)

This is the first characteristic of a woman of wisdom.

Like Abigail, a woman of wisdom is a woman who is intimately connected to God, hears his voice, and carries out immediately what He whispers to her. She does not delay doing his will. Instead, she responds quickly to God’s leading. Such a woman is also the kind of person who seeks to bring peace to a situation rather than add fuel to the fire.

When Abigail heard that Nabal had turned away David’s men, she could have run to her husband and tell him he had done the right thing and excited his pride and arrogance even more by encouraging his action. Instead, without saying a word to her husband, she sought to reconcile with David by bringing him a large gift and a statement of apology. She acted as a true peacemaker. This is a woman of wisdom!

However, the greatest gift Abigail gave David was not the two hundred loaves of bread, the two clay jars of wine, the five butchered sheep, the bushel of roasted grain, the one hundred clusters of raisins nor the two hundred cakes of pressed figs. Her greatest gift to David was reminding the King-to-be that he was God’s chosen one! After apologizing to David for Nabal’s foolish response to his request, Abigail saw the need to remind David of who he was. He was God’s anointed! God had personally chosen David to become King of Israel after Saul. David was not only the anointed one but he was also the man “who fights the Lord’s battles” (verse 28). David was meant to be God’s representative. And Abigail’s words revealed that she discerned God had great plans for David, a great purpose for his life. As such, David would be foolish to jeopardize any of it over a fool like Nabal who can never be spoken to.

Like a true woman of wisdom, Abigail demonstrated concern for David’s spiritual well being and his relationship with God:

” There will not be remorse or a troubled conscience for my lord…” (Verse 31)

A woman of wisdom is a woman who is not only connected to God but she cares for the spiritual well being of others. This is a woman who understands the importance of having a right relationship with the Lord. Abigail knew that useless bloodshed would not be pleasing to God and would impact David greatly.

Even more, a woman of wisdom is always there to bless the lives of those around her (Abigail protected Nabal’s men by intervening and all who would have been involved in a fight including David and her husband Nabal) and her words have the power to bring healing, restoration, and peace.

“The words of a person’s mouth are deep waters, a flowing river, a fountain of wisdom”
(Proverbs 18:4)

When others err from the path of God, a woman of wisdom can speak life to them and help them find their way back to the path of righteousness just as Abigail proved. She guides others back to God rather than pull anyone away from God. She is not foolish, hot-tempered, nor rude but shows respect, is gentle and humble (verse 23,41).

We should all seek to become a woman of wisdom. She is the woman who is called “blessed” by God and even by men. She is a woman who protects her husband even if this one can be as foolish as Nabal. She does not lie about her man (see Michal in 1 Samuel 19:17). Instead, she is known for seeking to honor God, honor her husband and cares about her husband living a God-honoring life. She is the crown of her husband and treats others fairly and with kindness. She is also a refuge for anyone in her life especially her husband.

Ladies, we too must seek to become women who are connected to God and in whom wisdom can always be found. To do so, we must ask God for the gift of wisdom and put on Christ every day. After all, Jesus was and is our perfect example. His intimacy with God granted him all the wisdom and knowledge he needed for this life. We too can receive the wisdom that the Lord is already willing to impart to us. We simply must ask him for it and be willing to linger at his feet like Mary. So let us drink from His well today. Let’s become the women God created us to be, women of discernment, women of wisdom, and women who are blessed.


Dear God, today I praise you for you are awesome and there is nothing beyond your understanding. Your wisdom is far beyond my understanding. I ask in the name of Jesus that you pour a generous measure of your wisdom to me today. Grant me understanding above all and help me to be a blessing to those around me.

When I am tempted to give in to anger, frustrations, bitterness or get hot-tempered, hide me in your secret place and give me the wisdom you know I stand in need of at that moment. Help me not to respond to others from a place of anger but from a place of love, understanding, and kindness. Let my words be a healing fountain for others. Let me always be connected to your Holy Spirit today in Jesus’ name I pray.


Dig Deeper

Proverbs 31:26
James 1:5
Ecclesiastes 2:13-14
Proverbs 4:7-9; 14:1,29
Proverbs 9 ( verse 10 in particular)

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